“Windsor Knot”
Dec 16, 2019I look in the mirror and don’t recognize the guy looking back at me. Maybe it was the martinis I had at dinner. Or maybe he’s just an asshole who thinks he is better than me.
His tie is tied with a Windsor knot. When did he learn to tie a tie like that? He kept it a secret. He didn’t want me to also know how to tie a Windsor knot. If I knew how, he would think I’d always try to match his style of dress. But I have my own style, and I’m comfortable with it. I don’t need to look like anyone else. T-shirt, jeans, Chucks, that’s enough for me.
He looks back at me, wearing a striped shirt and polka dot tie, a nice navy blue blazer on top, hair combed crisply. I see the look in his eyes, that look like he knows he’s better than me. He’s finally figuring out his life. All this time he thought he was unhappy being a bum. But he realized the struggle wasn’t worth it anymore. He tried and tried to get through life with a cocky attitude, but it stopped working. His friends and girlfriend and family and strangers on the street all told him he needs to get his act together or he’d be alone forever. Would that be so bad? he asked himself every day. He decided it might be and decided he needed to change. It wasn’t worth being pissed off at the world all the time. So he bought a suit. He discarded his old skin for the new. And he didn’t tell me about it. He just showed up one day looking back at me as I stared at him in the mirror.
“You think you’re so much better than me now?” I asked him.
He just kept on smirking while adjusting the fancy Windsor. I thought we would be clip-ons for life. We used to agree about things. But he’s changed. That suit has changed him. I don’t think I like him anymore. He seems fake, like he’s putting on airs just to make sure his friends and girlfriend and family and strangers on the street don’t abandon him. Seems kinda chickenshit to me. Not sure how much I can respect him now. We’ll talk about it later. I don’t want to fight right now.
We both take a sip of our martinis, looking each other in the eyes, a silent gesture of temporary truce. Being the bigger man, I walk away first.